Comparison. It is a thief. It robs us of so much. Comparison feeds our insecurities and leaves us paralyzed with inaction. It says, ‘what if…” and rarely does the speculative ‘what if’ scenario end with a positive outcome.
I heard author/speaker Jon Acuff say recently (paraphrasing), “we’ve always struggled with the grass is greener… but now we have 10,000 backyards, thanks to the Internet.” Isn’t that the truth? Social media has given us thousands more people with which to compare ourselves.
Comparison kept me on the sidelines of group fitness for most of my adult life. I was too scared to take any classes, fearing I wouldn’t be able to keep up or I would be completely out of step with everyone else. I only ventured into a group fitness class in my late 30s, when a friend who was teaching cycling classes invited me to join her. I figured, the lights are dim, and I could sit at the back to make a discreet escape if necessary. You know what I discovered? I LOVE group fitness, and no one is paying any attention to me. They’re all too focused on themselves to worry about what I’m doing! I eventually ventured into other classes where they kept the lights on the whole time. That’s when I discovered TRX and fell in love with strength training… and eventually became a TRX instructor.
Even as I considered launching this website, I started comparing myself to so many others who are much further along in writing, with a much more ‘polished’ message, who seem to be able to say what I want to say in a much better way. I love this analogy our pastor used in his sermon this week. He was preaching on the passage from 2 Peter about spiritual gifts and how each person has a unique gift to share as part of the body of Christ. The Summer Olympics have been underway these last couple of weeks and I have been so inspired and watched in awe these athletes’ performances. Now imagine deciding never to run, play volleyball or basketball, or do any of those sports again because you can’t even begin to compare to the Olympians’ level of talent. That’s ridiculous. Just because someone is more gifted or perhaps has more experience, that’s not a reason to ignore the gifts you have been given.
So how do we combat comparison? I’ve come up with an acronym for the word ‘compare’ that I hope will encourage you.
C: Celebrate others’ success. Just as I would want others to cheer me on and celebrate my successes, be that person for others.
O: Open your mind to learning and growing. If someone is doing something well, learn from them. Sign up for a course. Read. I’ll be sharing some of my favorite books here in upcoming posts.
M: Meditate on God’s word. When my eyes are focused on Jesus and what He has done for me through his death on the cross and resurrection, this world does grow strangely dim. I can only do this when I’m reading the Bible regularly and listening to what God is saying to me through his Word. Not sure where to start? Head over to my daughter’s blog, Live to the Lord, and take a quiz she created to help you figure out what to read in the Bible (click here for quiz). Another great resource: Dwell. It’s a great little app that lets you listen to the Bible. It has reading plans you can follow, too.
P: Perceive if these thoughts of comparison are true, kind, and helpful. Would you speak to another person (or your child) the words you speak to yourself when you are caught up in comparison?
A: Appreciate. Develop a habit of reflecting on 2-3 things each day for which you are grateful. Write these down as a reminder to yourself in those moments of comparison of the goodness in your own life.
R: Recognize much that you see on social media isn’t the whole story. You’re often only seeing others’ best, not their struggles.
E: Engage with others. Surround yourself with people who inspire and encourage you. “As iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend.” – Proverbs 27:17 (NLT)
Is your comfort zone or a fear of failure holding you back from trying something new or using the gifts God has given you? What can you do right now to move past your own hurdles?
CINDY DIEHL 